Friends, Hashers, countrymen, give me some beers;
We come to shame the hares, not to praise them.
The paltry shreddie these hares laid lives after them;
The shortcutters were oft confused with the FRB's;
So let it be with hare Pencillus Dickus.
The noble GM Erectus Malus
Hath told you Pencillus was ambitious:
If it were so, it was a grievous fault,
Pencillus doth set only an A to A to A run,
And grievously hath Pencillus answer'd such criticism.
Here, under leave of GM Erectus and the rest -
For GM Erectus thinks he is an honourable man;
Indeed were all the 30 betoga'd hashers honourable men and women -
And the bus crew were rejoicing to get an easy day,
And Friendly Bankus doth help to prepare the feast;
And the honorable hashers raised their glasses of ale to the sky,
And the run scoreth high marks along with the walk,
And five hashers were judged by their countrywomen led by Nutella Maximus,
Some had but no hair on their chests and paid for their sins,
Others paid for their lack of congeniality,
But Jackus Wankus was deemed the hasher hirsute,
A coat like a wild boar adorning his back and front ...
And Shittus Campus took upon himself the Robe of Congeniality,
And Cheezy Dickus from the Netherlands was conferred a mantle,
And the Hashers departed for the Great City to dine on American spoils,
And the hashers thanked Pencillus and Knobbus Doctoris for a Hash to remember.

Lostus Arseholis