|Today 23 October 2019|
Hashing: discovering amazing trails around Saigon like no one else
My mum just bought a dog off a blacksmith. As soon as she got him home, he made a bolt for the door.
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Date: 21/07/2019 Location: Dong Nai
Hares for the run were Paddy Fag and Chorizo, with The Ticker taking good care of the walkers. The walk report was given by Ballcock who said it was a lovely walk through nurseries and dumps and past the rotting carcasses of butchered pigs, the aroma certainly was certainly unforgettable. Despite the fact that the numbers were low everyone had a great time and he gave a score of 7. The run report was given by Lurprick, who was impressed by the smooth surfaces and beautiful surrounding, but disappointed that the Hares had failed to clean up all the rubbish on their reccie. He was also a victim of the infamous red ant attack, although there had been no warning of this danger from the hares. He awarded it 2 giving an overall score of 4.5.
The virgin for this run was Ha from Vietnam who came with Patrick. The returnees were Chorizo and Peckerhead.
Chorizo charged all the miscreant Hashers. Shithouse and Sloe Gin for sex on the hash; they had been spotted fondling Spandex Man and Turn Off respectively. Turn Off was charged with pissing on the trail, at least Chorizo had found one Hasher with a weaker ladder than his own. The front runners, Patrick, Bambino Chichalina and Chichi Madera, were also charged with bragging about how fast the run was. This was followed up when Chichi Madera turned on his fellow front runner Patrick describing how he had been dashing about backward and forwards with seemingly boundless energy. They heard him calling On On at one of the checks and dashed up the trail only to find him gaily swinging on a swing without a care in the world.
Paddy Fag was still feeling religious. He charged Ballcock, Sing Sing, Shithouse and Lurprick for imitating Jesus, when they get fucked on Friday it takes them until Sunday before they can rise again. The Vietnamese were charged for missing a trick. If they had recognised Good Friday as a national holiday we could all have had 3 long weekends on the trot. He also charged the Christians for setting the president for Brexit. If they could wait so long for Jesus to come again how could anyone expect the British to expect that independence would come again in the next century. The Christians were also charged with being greedy, the Pope has declared it so it must be true. Sexy Eyes then charged the British Christians. As a committed Pagan she would have been dancing naked in the woods celebrating fertility with rabbits and eggs for Oestra. However, all that had been stolen away by the Christians who just wanted to worship some foreign geezer. Ironic given that now all the British seem to want to do is get rid of all the foreign geezers.
Peckerhead was then charged for being a committed Earth lover, he had been so overcome by its beauty that he had decided he needed to give the Earth a hug. Hashers behind him had been confused by the crater he left behind believing it to r the result of B52 bombing. Peckerhead then charged the hares with failing to provide a beer stop. He had come with dong in his pocket ready to help stimulate the local economy but to no avail.
Chorizo was charged with leading his poor innocent co-hares astray, not on the trail but through the seedy backstreet bars of district one. They had been unable to resist being filled with the Easter spirit.
Turn Off then charged Chorizo for giving no warning about the vicious ant attack that had been launched at him. To make matters worse when the attack was underway he choose to stand back taking photos rather than rushing to Turn Offs aid. Luckily the heroine Sloe Gin was present to deal with the vicious beasts.
Chichi Madera was then charged with disrespecting haberdash. He had traded his first harset T shirt in a thoughtless fashion and then complained that the replacement provided by Shit house was not of the same impeccable quality.
Bambino was charged with doping. He had been observed dropping something purple into his water. Doping can be the only explanation for why he had left most of the other Hashers in his dust.
The leaving of Lurprick, Sing Sing, Chorizo and Spandex Man was celebrated and they were joined by those who were incapable of leaving. You guessed it: the British.
The On On was held at O'Briens.
That's all for this week.
Sexy Eyes signing off.
Date: 28/04/2019 Location: District 7
There will not be a us or a pick up at D2. Hashers should make their own way to Pitchers Sports and Grill for a 3 pm start. The Hash always needs hares let us know when you want to set your trail.
The Saigon Monday Hash House Harriers run every Monday - surprisingly enough! The start point is always posted on Facebook so please get into the habit of checking it out if you want to run with them (details here).
The Saigon Hash House Harriettes host a city run on the Friday closest to every Full Moon.
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