|Today 22 March 2018|
A Currit Coetus Cum A
Date: 23/07/2017 Location: Dong Nai province along the mighty Song Duong (again)
A small but enthusiastic bunch of runners led by Fucoffee departed the now familiar vast subdivision to follow the well-worn 9+ km. loop that ended at the Temple gate carpark 1 hour 30min later, and an even smaller bunch of walkers (2 to be exact) led by Jack Off undertook a smaller 1 hour loop to the same destination (fortunately, but JO did manage to get the walkers lost due to an over reliance on his GPS for directions).
The Circle was called to order by stand-in GM Tinky Winky who threatened diabolical consequences to any hasher who dared to disobey his instructions.
In-Bound gave the run report with the introduction that there was something in it for everyone: river, hornets, shiggy, more hornets, shade and lots of paper. He indicated that he enjoyed the run and after much consideration gave it a -10, which some of the runners thought was an overly generous score. Izzy Doc gave the walk report which he described as a muddy adventure due to their getting lost and attacked by hornets – specifically who targeted his walking partner Cunning Linguist (who clearly wasn’t a happy hasher by the time they made it back to the bus). A score of -3.25 was awarded which gave a total score for the hash of -6.625.
The GM called on the Religious Adviser to introduce visitors and returnees and PM2 stepped up to the task, but was immediately overcome by the array of eligible males available so she had to be relieved of her duties by Paddy Fag, who welcomed Roy from Taiwan, Keith from Kuala Lumpur, Doggy Style (back on his regular 6 monthly search for a new mother-in-law), Izzy Doc on the annual sex tour, and Peckerhead (couldn’t remember why he came).
The GM then placed Whiteboy Sotong Shut-up on the ice for being the stand-in Hash song but not remembering any of the songs.
Hash dobber Whiteboy Sotong Shut-up charged Harmonica Lewinsky, PM2, Jack Off, Tastes Great, and Fucoffee for being hornet magnets and therefore usurping the role of Tinky Winky who is the default hash hornet magnet. (It wasn’t clear whether Cunning Linguist was included – having been attacked twice, or whether she was engaged in a one person strike against all hash activities in protest against the reign of terror created by Jack Off on the walk.)
Charges from the Circle were:
Turn Off charged the hares for the poor condition of the trail that caused young General Erection to take a tumble and sustain injuries that might scar him for life – mentally, if not physically. (An excellent charge!)
Paddy Fag charged Doggy Style for using the hash as an excuse for his on-going quest for wife number 6.
Hamonica Lewensky charged PM2 for an apparent interest in Doggy Style and Tyler that had something to do with them being all “prick and ribs”. It is possible that jealousy was his primary motivation.
In Bound charged all Americans for double standards in that they were natural loud-mouths except on the hash where they were always low-volume bordering on silent running – or something along those lines.
Paddy Fag charged all Vietnamese for a recent incident written up in the local press in which, apparently, a lady inserted chillies in the private part of another lady for some minor indiscretion – which gave a new meaning to the term “hot pussy”.
Paddy Fag charged all the Englanders for making a film about Brexit in which the Germans forced the Brits out of Europe – the film being called “Dunkirk”. (Ya gotta think about it a bit but there is a connection).
Fucoffee charged Izzy Doc for a clandestine meeting with Head Mistress in Ethiopia. ID gave a mumbled excuse that was rejected by all and sundry.
Finally, a somewhat confused charge by PM2 to Tyler and Foam Me Too for some real or imagined indiscretion that may or may not have been witnessed by Harmonica Lewinsky and Jack Off and possibly involved a person named Sticky Rice that nobody had ever heard of, but wished they had.
The GM requested Jack Off to provide details of the ON ON: JO explained that it was a new ‘do-it-yourself’ concept for the Hash where hashers could choose the own 3*#%ing restaurant, select the own 3*#%ing meal and 3*#%ing drink, and pay for it them 3*#%ing selves. It appeared that all assembled hasher declined this innovative invitation.
The Circled closed with 5 minutes of casual drinking.
Next HashRun 1412:
Date: 30/07/2017 Location: Nui Dinh, Vung Tau
The hareas for this run will be Stevie Blunder, Foamy Me 2 and Phuc My 2. This hash has been long in waiting. The streams are now full, the waterfalls are spectacular and most of all the ponds are filled and the swing is in place. Make sure you learn to swim and you will enjoy this hash like no other.
There will be a pick up in D2.
The bus will leave the Caravelle at prompt, so please make sure you are there by . For directions please click here.
The Hash always needs hares let us know when you want to set your trail.
The Saigon Monday Hash House Harriers run every Monday - surprisingly enough! The start point is always posted on Facebook so please get into the habit of checking it out if you want to run with them (details here).
The Saigon Hash House Harriettes will be hosting a run on the first Friday of next month. Details will be available in the preceding week.
For details please click here.
Next year we will be co-hosting the Indochina Mekong Hash with the Nha Trang hash. It will be in Nha Trang on the weekend commencing Friday the 21st September and finishing Sunday the 23rd September. The running trails will be set by Saigon hares and the Nha Trang hares will set the walking trails, volunteers would be welcome. We have also offered our expertise in the provision of T-shirts and goody bags, creative ideas will be considered. Our very own General Erection has kindly volunteered to coordinate the registration process.
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